Who knows you wear?

With kind regards,
Pete

Pete,
I'm at a similar situation to you. I hate the fact the someone will know, but I think you really should tell someone. First of all he could always tell you if the piece look ok or not, and also he could tell you what people are saying behind your back.

Personally I'm going to tell my close family (mother, father, sis, bro), and one close friend that I know I can trust.

Pete,

Yes it's very possible. I've been wearing for about 4 years as an HCM member. No one in my family is aware of it. The only person that knows (other than my stylist at the time) is my gf (who I have just told RECENTLY...a week ago, actually).

Leamon

Leamon: I will be doing the same thing I suppose. If at some point I have to tell, then so be it, but it could be I never have to then I'm glad I didnt.

Jonesy: Thanks for the advice man. Its true, a second opinion is very usefull but I should be able to handle it.

What I did to avoid that situation... was ...
I didn't go in for such a radical look from my
original hairstyle ....

(of course, I was using concealers at the time
which gave the 'Illusion' of hair ) !

Many of the guys who attended BA's real
neat Windsor Convention saw me before my piece ..
and they have seen my 'After' pics posted
somewhere on here ... and can testify to that !

Hair can make a difference ... I have to explain
to my 30 year old clients ...

"Hey Hon ....don't get that family man ideas about us
nesting and settling down ....Damn ...I'm as old as
your dad "

And I now have to prove to clients I have been in the
business I have been in and have 31 years experience ...

The best thing is ....women who wouldn't give
me a second glance a few years ago ... according to
my sister ... are flirting with me ....

eupe124 Wrote:Leamon: I will be doing the same thing I suppose. If at some point I have to tell, then so be it, but it could be I never have to then I'm glad I didnt.

Jonesy: Thanks for the advice man. Its true, a second opinion is very usefull but I should be able to handle it.

If your girlfriend was keeping a similar secret from you and then you found out/discovered it later, how would you feel? Might you feel that she should have had the confidence in your feelings for her that she could have shared her fears and vulnerabilities with you?

I get not wanting the world to know that you wear (or about to wear). But I think it's even more important not to become so obsessively guarded with this "secret" that you start walling off very important parts of who you are. At that point, the sense of shame surrounding your hair loss is exacting too great a toll. Losing one's hair is not a shameful thing -- unfortunate (for many), no doubt -- it's not a character flaw. As so many have mentioned here, wearing should be fun and liberating, not a hairy bandaid for a damaged psyche. You can wall yourself off only so much before the self-punishment borne of secrecy is worse than a Norwood 5000.

I remember when Willard Scott, the now ancient weatherman for the Today Show, used to take off/put on his hairpiece in the middle of a segment with a huge grin. The whole world knew and he couldn't care and the whole world thought nothing less of him, his fans probably loved him more for it. After all, there are few things more attractive than someone who's comfortable in their own skin even if part of it is covered with someone else's hair.

Bangless Wrote:I get not wanting the world to know that you wear (or about to wear). But I think it's even more important not to become so obsessively guarded with this "secret" that you start walling off very important parts of who you are. At that point, the sense of shame surrounding your hair loss is exacting too great a toll. Losing one's hair is not a shameful thing -- unfortunate (for many), no doubt -- it's not a character flaw. As so many have mentioned here, wearing should be fun and liberating, not a hairy bandaid for a damaged psyche. You can wall yourself off only so much before the self-punishment borne of secrecy is worse than a Norwood 5000.

I remember when Willard Scott, the now ancient weatherman for the Today Show, used to take off/put on his hairpiece in the middle of a segment with a huge grin. The whole world knew and he couldn't care and the whole world thought nothing less of him, his fans probably loved him more for it. After all, there are few things more attractive than someone who's comfortable in their own skin even if part of it is covered with someone else's hair.

I couldn't agree with you more.

I will be honest with you.....I'm still not at the point where I'm going to pull it off in a crowd of people (mainly because it would perpetuate the myth that the piece is going to come off with a puff of wind), but I can assure you that the fact that most of my family and friends knowing is a huge weight off my shoulders.

I understand that it's a personal choice who you choose to share this with and who you don't, but with the results we can achieve with today's hair systems it is only shameful if YOU make it out to be. This is a REAL and VIABLE solution to hairloss that was not available to the general public for this price just a few years ago. There is no shame in wearing a natural looking piece.

Matter of fact I am sitting in a hair salon this very moment waiting to get a cut-in.

This salon is right next door to my business, and all of the stylists that work here know I wear. My entire immediate family knows. My business partner knows. My employee knows. A bunch of other guys I work with know. My real estate agent knows. My handful of really good friends know. Most of the women I am friends with know. And I get compliments from these people (and others who don't know I wear) all the time.

I am getting ready to release a DVD and Youtube videos, so my face is going to be plastered out there for all the world to see. And you know what? At this point it feels good. I'm actually proud of it!

Point is, try to get yourself comfortable with the idea of wearing. Once you get that part handled you won't worry so much about what others think and you will approach this hair game from a different perspective.

Quote:I remember when Willard Scott, the now ancient weatherman for the Today Show, used to take off/put on his hairpiece in the middle of a segment with a huge grin. The whole world knew and he couldn't care and the whole world thought nothing less of him, his fans probably loved him more for it. After all, there are few things more attractive than someone who's comfortable in their own skin even if part of it is covered with someone else's hair.

He just didn't have anything to lose. Probably was married and she couldn't care less.

If you're young and single you have only things to lose if people know.

edited.

Jonesy123 Wrote:He just didn't have anything to lose. Probably was married and she couldn't care less.

If you're young and single you have only things to lose if people know.

I'm not suggesting that anyone emulate his Willard's behavior (he was, after all, a clown by profession -- he played Ronald McDonald early in his career), but his self-ease is worth striving toward.

The Willard Scott anecdote exemplifies an extreme. But the other extreme is concealing personal information from your significant other. At some point the act of concealing morphs into an act of deceit where you're denying deeper and more meaningful parts of yourself. Successful intimate relationships are about the process of revealing yourself and the furthering of trust, not living a secret life petrified of being uncovered, as it were.