Val,
I simply don't get it/you.

You did research that led you to buy a piece. But at the cut-in, the 'top person in the country' told you not to go ahead and that forums were misleading.

So you don't go ahead, but you turn to the very same forums you were warned against?

If you believed this guy's opinion on wearing detectability, enough to put you off wearing, surely you also believe his opinion on us, the notorious fibbers of the forums?

You seem to not know your own mind or trust your own opinion and yet at the same time state quite emphatically that you'll have boundless confidence if a piece looks good on you.
What if you think it looks great, but one person says it doesn't?

Your history illustrates that you'll have to start all over again.

In my own snide & facetious way, I am actually trying to help you.
You need to trust your own judgement, not other people's.