First off, I've only been wearing for about a month, so ya know, grain of salt.

I'm kinda in your boat at the moment as far as people wanting to touch my hair. I'm wearing a stock unit from Toplace and if it's a fresh attachment, I don't mind letting the date run from the back of my neck to the top of my head. As long as I've got a great tape perimeter all the way up to the edge of the lace, I'm fine.

Front hairline is a different story - I'm still new. I'm using ORWG and trying to get it quite right. I always seem to have a little "bump" at the hairline which I don't like. I found Got2B is better (but never lasts a whole day) and Got2B Ultra can be messy - but they're less noticeable than ORWG for me right now.

I know this doesn't really answer your questions, but as far as I know, I'm wearing French Lace (the most detectable) and have no problem with people touching my hair from the back or sides.

In time, I'll be fine with the front hairline as well. I currently have an exposed hairline and it looks great. I just say "hey, lots of product" or something like that if they make me uncomfortable.

Hope this helps,