All of the above is most likely the result of it being a cheap wig.
Swiss Lace or even the Superfine Swiss Lace is softer and disguises well.
Hair direction can be specified when ordering and only cheap over processed hair tangles.
People use all sorts of conditioners from wig specific to normal shop bought.
Lots of people use a daily leave-in conditioner.
Most people will tell you not to let the conditioner get to the knots as this can cause them to loosen and you get shedding.

Buying the cheap wig was a good idea of seeing how it works in principle, but not a good example of what can be achieved using a good supplier & having one made to your specs.